Eintracht Frankfurt: The deadly fun
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OfThomas Stillbauer
conclude
Eintracht Frankfurt bad, Sky bad, world bad, Cologne wins. Our column Ballhorn
If even sushi doesn’t help anymore – what else should Eintracht lead to success? Ballhorn, the only live ticker in the top European leagues that only appears after the game, is somewhat at a loss, but has at least solved the difficult nutritional question for after the game in good time. And the most important thing comes at the very end.
-27 minutes: Hello again.
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-24 minutes: Let’s go then.
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-22 minutes: Here’s to something new.
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-20 minutes: It won’t be particularly easy in Cologne either.
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-18 minutes: But one thing is certain:
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-17 minutes: At least there is no home defeat today, business friends.
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-15 minutes: And that’s something.
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-13 minutes: What’s missing?
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-12 minutes: The first threesome when Ballhorn has sushi in the fridge for later.
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-10 minutes: That didn’t help in Dortmund.
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-9 minutes: One point against the Saxon sticky shower.
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-7 minutes: So the cold fish will bring victory in Cologne today.
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-5 minutes: Don’t thank me.
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-3 minutes: As always, the decisive factor is …
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-2 minutes: … the jersey color.
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-1 minute: Black. Running.
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Kick-off: Christian “Machkei” Dingert.
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1st minute: It’s just a game.
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?. Minute: Always remember.
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?. Minute: Ah. Sky has technical problems.
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?. Minute: “Due to technical problems, no game-related graphics can currently be sent.”
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?. Minute: Among other things, you cannot see which minute is currently running.
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?. Min: It doesn’t matter.
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?. Minute: It’s just a game.
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?. Minute: And the camera shows nothing but the long shot.
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?. Minute: It’s exactly like that…
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?. Minute: … as if I were filming the whole thing with my cell phone.
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?. Minute: In addition, Seppl Rode has just missed the 147 percent chance to make it 0:1.
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?. Minute: Well, that’s it.
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?. Minute: It’s a game.
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?. Minute: At the moment only Eintracht fans can be heard.
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?. Minute: “Schwaaaaaaarz and white like Cologne!”
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?. Minute: Pardon: “like snow!”
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?. Minute: Not that you will soon have to spend half an ALG2 sentence to watch your favorite team’s games on TV.
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?. Minute: With lots of TV advertising, of course.
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?. Minute: To watch a game filmed by a total of one camera.
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?. Minute: But the advertisements work perfectly.
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?. Minute: Oh well. Anyway.
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?. Minute: What does that show us?
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?. Minute: The game, also the football game …
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?. Minute: … is now a minor matter.
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?. Minute: It’s about television. It’s about the money.
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?. Minute: Otherwise the game would not have gone through the entire Corona phase.
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?. Minute: Whether there are spectators in the stadium or not …
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?. Minute: … that’s a difference for the atmosphere.
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?. Minute: On TV.
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?. Minute: Then it sells a little better.
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?. Minute: With the atmosphere.
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?. Minute: But it works without it too.
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?. minutes: the game.
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?. Minute: However, the quality on the pitch today is more …
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?. Minute: …sub-complex.
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?. Minute: In any case, it has nothing to do with Europe.
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?. Minute: Unless we are in the competition for Europe’s worst football game.
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HZP: You also have to consider:
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INHZP: “Due to technical problems, no game-related graphics can be sent at the moment.”
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INHZP: Subtext: “Even slow motion, you can take your make-up off for today.”
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?. Minute: Ah, we change. Seppl out, Deitschi in.
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?. Minute: Then only the deadly fun is missing.
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?. minutes: sorry. Happen.
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?. Minute: Today at the latest the proof will be given:
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?. Minute: You can unlearn how to play football.
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?. Minute: You can throw a lot of praise to the Eintracht fans on site.
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?. Minute: You are loud. you are unity
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?. minutes: respect.
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?. Minute: The whole scene is a bit reminiscent of 1996.
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?. Minute: Eintracht Köln played similarly “strongly” forward.
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?. Minute: And in the end it’s three zero for the billy goat.
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?. Minute: We prefer to spare ourselves the rest.
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?. Minute: Are there still peanuts?
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?. Minute: There is a relatively large amount of beer available in the Ballhorn studio today.
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?. Minute: Various changes in the Eintracht game. Ballhorn will of course tell you whether it is relevant.
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?. Minute: And one zero Cologne. No, I’m harassing Modeste.
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?. Minute: Oh yeah. Who didn’t expect that?
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?. Minute: Deitschi is allowed out again.
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?. Minute: He deserves it.
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?. Minute: But hey.
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?. Minute: It’s just a game.
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Final whistle: It’s good that we already have 31 points.
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97 minutes: And of course …
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99 minutes: Sushi.
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100 minutes: It is unimportant, business friends.
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102 minutes: What is important today are these names:
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Gokhan Gultekin
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Sedat Gurbuz
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Said Nesar Hashemi
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Mercedes Kierpacz
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Hamza Kurtovic
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Vili Viorel Păun
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Fatih Saraçoğlu
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Ferhat Unvar
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Kaloyan Welkov
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Say their names.
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And especially:
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Nazis out.