In all our relationships lie unconscious issues of manipulation. This is why we are manipulative and sometimes manipulated. Karpman theorized one of these manipulation patterns with three main postures. It is about the savior, the victim and the persecutor. This is the Karpman triangle, also called the dramatic triangle. It works based on psychological games that take place between two people. Each of them, moreover, is capable of interpreting the three roles alternately.
A multi-player triangle
We all have a position that we prefer. To save, victim or persecutor. To play our role, we must be accompanied. Indeed, a savior needs a victim to rescue. This is why, when we are in a posture, we will tend to look for people to complete it. Our posture is not linear, it can change and go from victim to persecutor for example depending on relationships.
The antidote to the dramatic triangle
Karpman has worked on the pendant of the dramatic triangle: the compassionate triangle. Its mission: to get us out of our postures.
First track: seek to understand what makes us react or overreact. For example, what are our needs when we take on the role of persecutor or victim?
Second step: understand the needs of other “players”. By recognizing their needs, it negates their role play.
If a savior tries to save you and you tell them about their need to rescue you, you recognize their posture. By telling him this clearly, he feels recognized and that plays down the relational level.