Phillies re-signs a man named John Finland
On a blog that is better suited for reporting this news like this, it was reported that sub-league kidnapper John Finland had re-signed Phillies.
Is this John the kidnapper’s mask? We will never know! Mark J. Rebilas-USA TODAY Sports
Apparently John has a signature “Finland the money” phrase that makes him worth what Phillies pays him. Never breaking the MLB list, Finland has made it to Triple-A on several occasions since 2007. His OPS seems to have danced between the upper .600 and the lower .700 many, many times, leveling to a cool .722. career.
But Finland will fulfill the ungrateful role of IronPigs opening day, grabbing Phillies ’upcoming bullpenners and hitting alongside rehabilitative stars. Last year, at the age of 31, Finland composed the .265 / .311 / .393 line, grabbed four home runs and even stole a base.
Meanwhile, Scott Elarton, a 35-year-old IronPigs starter who had returned to baseball after a three-year absence, has on the way to the Major League Tour. The guy went 6-11 last season with an ERA of 5.41 and was pulled down to 3.6 BB / 9. But there are some teams that miss the long ones, one of which is the Minnesota Twins, which Elarton has attracted. Likely to start on his Triple-A list in 2013, Elarton, if his progress continues, will be able to break the cycle behind Vance Worley.
Of course, not an epic signage day, but it’s necessary and nice for guys like Finland and Elarton to get the shots they deserve. They will no doubt play more professional baseball than I did in 2013.
Or… he….
**Tears the shoulder muscle of the leg that reaches the bowl of the shavings **
O SLAKE UNBELIEF JESUS